- Paul Fink
Dreams
Everyone has dreams. My dreams are normally weird (in general) and sometimes very vivid and not relevant or no meaning and very random. Sometimes I can't remember or I have forgotten the dream.
One recurring dream I have is about running. Prior to my stroke I loved long-distance running because running is liberating and clears my mind. Unfortunately, I can't run now because I have early-arthritis to my knees (maybe I will write about my knees after a different post because my knees so important) ... But bottom line, sometimes still dreaming of running now and my running dreams always be in perfect health, no strokes, no niggling injuries, no rolled ankle etc ... and freedom of running anywhere. I quote the baseball movie (Field of Dreams - Dr. 'Moonlight' Graham) -'That's my wish. And is there enough magic out there in the moonlight to make this dream come true?' I hope so...
My experiences with dreams around my coma is best explained in a book I am currently reading. In Dan Brown's book, Inferno, when discussing amnesia, he explains: 'The brain function that sorts and catalogs your memory has been temporarily shaken up... your memories will be muddled and uncataloged - past, present and imagination all mixed together. The same thing happened in dreams'. No idea this right... because I am not a doctor, but I like this quote because it's how I feel about what I remember from ICU.
At the Alfred hospital (after my stroke), very hard to get a clear picture of my dreams because interfered with my brain and everything was blurry. I couldn’t distinguish what was real or what was my imagination / dreams and it is a mystery if in the coma or after waking up... or real life. (The medications definitely contributed to this confusion). Doesn't matter, will write anyway :) here we go...
Prior to my stroke, Loz and I were starting a new TV show (Prisoners of war - Hebrew TV program similar to Homeland - definitely recommend it!!) and I dreamt that I saw Palestinians and Israel doctors helping side by side in a hospital. I thought it was linked to the middle east peace process, showing that both sides could work together (similar to Peace Team in the Australian Rules Football).
I dreamt two doctors operating me. Two very experienced middle-age doctors and one doctor is this guy... Actor Jon Favreau. (I know... weird)
I kept recalling an image of what I thought was the duty free shopping sections at Melbourne airport. But I found out months later when revisiting the ICU, that my visions was the view from my bed. (See image below).
I dreamt I was playing cricket between Australia and Pakistan at sub-continent. Not sure which specific country but I remember that very hazy and sun setting (I use the cricket term - the wicket was a dustbowl). But I was not happy because I was out (cheaply) and something was wrong this situation. I was convinced that the match was corrupt or match fixing occurred. Anyway Younis Khan scored a double hundred (in the dream). Fast forward to nine months after my stroke (Real life now...) Pakistan defeated Australia at Abu Dhabi and Younis Khan awarded player of the series (including double hundred and one hundred). Coincidence????
I dreamt of my friend Dave Gelbart with one of his sons, walking at Tel Aviv beach and two sharks were circling around in the water.
Last dream is personal. I dreamt of a family member was dead. This dream so vivid and surreal. When I woke up from my coma, this family member came to visit me and I was so shocked. I was convinced he had passed away. I was relieved, and thankfully this person is still alive.
Thinking about all of this, I feel that it's likely these dreams happened once I was awake but still on lots of medication. I unfortunately don't recall anything that people said to me while I was in my coma. It's hard to get an idea what was in my mind and what was reality.
I reckon the medication was playing tricks on me.
